Falling in love

I haven't sat down to blog in a long time, so how about I catch you up?

Well, for starters, Spring Break was last week. It was great. Very low-key, lots of movie watching and junk food, and I even splurged for a few things I'd been dying to have, like a movie and a destroyed pair of jeans that make my legs look devastating. I dyed my hair a magnificent shade of burgundy to top everything off.

I still haven't unpacked...

Also, I've begun writing a book. The subject matter is a bit personal, but in writing about it, it's become more real to me than ever before, and it's making me feel more me than I've felt in years. Letting my weird come out like this has made me feel something I didn't know I could still feel. Calm.

It's resulting in long hours of me laying on my bed, thinking back through dreams I've had as a kid, and typing as fast as my fingers can. I'm not staying in my room because I'm too depressed to come out (like last semester), I'm staying in because I'm too excited about what I'm writing to come out.

Needless to say, I'm really excited about it.

In other news, I've fallen in love. With a pastrami sandwich. It's at The Pastry Pub here in Cedar, and they use this herb sauce that I can't help but dream about. It's that delicious. I've also fallen in love with this new me that I've become. This relaxed, silly, borderlining-on-best-version me.

Dating has become something of the past for me. I'm so preoccupied with my book, and helping my best friend start a business, and actually attending class for a change, that I'm realizing I can afford this break. I know to some people I'm exactly what they want, but at least until May I am in a relationship with my commitments and education. I'm only 21, and I've got plenty of time to worry about marriage.

Anyway, keep it real readers.

The Edge of Insanity....er...Insomnia.

So, It is about four minutes to five right now...in the morning. No, I am not some masochist who gets up early. I haven't fallen asleep yet. I haven't been able to get a good night's sleep since before the last time I got sick.

So what am I doing? Laying in bed and playing on the internet. I have committed myself to staying up all night tonight, and tomorrow --er-- later today, I'm going to take a nice walk in order to get a little exercise. It's going to be a long day indeed. I plan on getting some homework done, filling out a new FAFSA, filling out an application for a summer job, spending time with my old buddy Jana, and sometime amidst all of that, catching a movie with my mommy.

I'll sleep GREAT tomorrow....I hope.

This is ridiculous. I really wish I could sleep. I'm starting to feel tired now finally, but I have COMMITTED to staying up all night in order to get back on my old sleep schedule.

Wish me luck.

Keep it real readers.

10 Minutes of Honesty

My best friend came up with an idea where we just be completely honest for 10 minutes. I thought nothing of it, because he and I are always completely honest with each other. However, after the 10 minutes ended, we hadn't really made any huge revelations about each other. Then we just started talking as usual, and that's when the real questions started.

We finally talked about when we dated. We finally discussed what happened. It made me feel better about what happened between us. Relieved, I guess.

It's weird though. I haven't told him this, but since we broke up I have had zero interest in dating. Like, for a change, I just want to focus on school and my family and my friends.

Anyway, in short, 10 minutes of honesty turned into one interesting conversation.

Still sick, but I'm on the mend. It's only six more days until Spring Break, and I intend to be well by then.

Keep it real readers.

Sick Irony

So, being sick makes me feel weirdly bitter and angry.

I went on a multi-hour rampage about how ever since I moved back to Cedar I feel like I've always been either getting sick or getting over being sick. Not so fun.

Truth be told that's not true, but I just seemed to have felt that way today. Bear in mind I'm rounding out my sixth day of illness.

I've been teaching one of my roommates the fine art of flirting, and as she's become more confident and at ease with the opposite sex, I've found myself becoming more and more asexual. It's ironic.

I can't wait until the end of the semester. It's been a long road here at SUU, and I think I'm going to take a few semesters and knock out some classes that are much cheaper and easier before I come back.

Keep it real readers.